Eyes hurt, head really hurts. I think....I think I remember being hit...I think so.

Don't want to be asleep, but don't want to be awake either...it just hurts

if it dosen't metter why ami here? i doun't nkow what i shuld bee doin... mabe i shouln't do nything cuase if iit dousn't mater then whhy do anytihng? headhurts eyes hutr evetything juts hutrs anmore



whgat do any we do/? what ammi spposed to do?

[OOC: Toshi hasn't slept in a good long while, which is why he's making no sense. Feel free to wonder what's up with him.]

So there’s some rambling idiot giving some Crispin day speech in hopes of rallying the troops or something. I listen to the whole damn thing so now I’m going to say my bit as someone who’s been here for far too long.

You are not special. Not you, not me and not anyone. I know that we were told we are because we are here but that’s a bunch of lies. We are not some mythically chosen ones or some grand army for humankind, we’re not even prisoners or slaves…we’re toys. The Warden has been playing us since day fucking one and that’s the true hard-core fact. The Warden saved us from the old compound not out of anything more than the fact he didn’t want to lose his toys. He told us we are here to fight…and yet there has been no training, no information giving and he pops in once and awhile to check on us like someone dusting off their collection of dolls from time to time. That’s all there is people, end of story.

There’s nothing else to it, we are here as a source of amusement until something better comes along and when that does happen they’ll most likely nuke us all. There is no big, important meaning. No higher purpose. If you want to believe that crap about epic battle against good and evil then by all means do. I have been here long enough to know better now.

Some days are better than others, I find myself thinking about how things were when I first came here. I keep trying to remember how I did and how I didn't just lose my mind. Having Ryou here helps a lot, so I'm thankful to have him here.

I don't want to think about how long it's been since she left...I got to keep my mind busy or else I'm going to snap.

A yukata? I've only seen these things in history books, back before Japan went to hell. So there's a festival going on right now? It might have been fun with Atem but I think I'll stay where I am.

I feel...I don't know. These past few days have been so draining I'm not sure what to think anymore. First I lost Sora...now Atem and Copy. God damnit, the last thing I ever told him was I never wanted to see him again. Looks like I got my wish, huh? And Atem...she asked me when we wanted to get married...I never got to chance to ask her if it could be Oct. the 14th, it's when my parents got married so I thought it would be nice. It's never going to happen, is it? Any of what we planned, me living with her, being her husband. It was all pipe dreams.

Mai...I don't know if I should thank you or hate you for what you did. I know that's not what you want to hear, but I can lie about it.

Ryou is back, the one that was here before. It's the only thing I can thankful for. So, for now I'll try to deal for his sake. until he disappears as well

I really hate this place. Everything went to hell this month and now just as I'm normal again, Atem is in a coma. God I hope you're okay, angel. Don't know what I would do without you. This apartment is so empty now that Sora is gone. I miss him so much, I really failed as a father for him, did I? Yuuko and Cassis are gone too...I hate this place.

At least Mai is here....never thought I say that.

[sounds of someone in a panic running about the room, Toshi's now child-like voice calling out]

Sora? Sora?! W-where are you? Y-you can't be gone, you can't be! T-this is a joke, right? 'Cause I'm home now and you have to be home too. P-please come...

[whimper, poor little thing sounds like he's going to cry]

Sora...

[OOC: Toshi finally came back to Ci-Tessera only to find that Sora is gone. Given that he's now five years old he's going to do what most five year olds would do at this point: have a good hard cry.]